I keep this blog running and recording things about my life, but mostly for the touchy part of my life. I always keep them in a small book, which includes things I don’t really have the guts to share openly.

However recently I feel that I am ready to release some true feelings of myself, by releasing one of the posts I wrote, and also the longest. That describes myself, how I see relationship, and about the girl that I actually love, and miss. I never admit that I like this girl, until I realize she is not there, and when I read the 14 pages I wrote because of this girl. Yes, I am an idiot, and I cannot believe I was being so selfish to be the “ideal” person that I think I always want.

 

1^st June 2010

There is something I wanted to write, to talk about. Sadly, the subject that contradict with who I am, who I think I should be. Or it is something that I rarely talk about, which will surprise people or confuse people of who am I.

Sometimes I wonder why I am not to be together with someone. I consider myself not being too bad as a person, physically or mentally. I do notice that there are some people who are interested in me, starring and quickly turn away pretending they did not when I notice. I always pretend not to notice because I don’t want to embarrasse them or after all, I am not interested at the person at the first place. If they talk nicely to me, I will always chat with them, but I just don’t really click on them.

And I do not consider myself shy. I once thought I was, so I actually just randomly ask two strange girls to go out. Yes I failed, kind of stupid, and yet cocky, but the whole thing is not to get into anything, but rather to test if I am shy. And thus it turns out I ain’t shy at all, which I wonder if that’s a good or bad news after knowing what life I was having.

Perhaps people find me hard to approach; mostly I assume it is because I have that stubborn, determined and confident face. I understand, I am born like that and I cannot really change that look on me. Even my friends feel it. Once people interact with me, they can sense that I am not exactly what they expect me to be. And I only get that face hard on me when I am at my 2009 final year and 2010 Honours. To me, it is hard to believe people can be cheerful and happy while doing that program.

 

All I can say is I have my study as my burden (in 2010), or an excuse in a way. “If you want to go and get someone, you should just go for it.”

Yes, I would love to do so, and I have guts to do so as I have proved myself. But in the other hand, I do not want to ruin thing, my academic, or the consequence with that person which I do not think I could bear. Perhaps, I am just too scared to talk to someone I truly like.

In my past asking out experience, I find love is difficult. If I really like one of these 2 girls, it is very hard to let the other person to trust me. Although I know I can work it out through time. However even it is not the case, there are still other concerns, stuck on someone else, life issues, academic, family influence, and so many other things. While all these matters exist, it is still a mission to meet those trouble people, not to mention to meet that right one. The world is so big, there are so many perfect fits, but how can I guarantee I will meet someone.

My love… is a mental torture. When I have this crush on this girl, I got scared. Scared that the person not feeling the same, scared not to see the person before I express myself, scared that my emotion will scare her.

I realize when I like someone, it is not like those random ask out that I can just go for it. Because love makes me feel the fear, fear about the consequence, fear of the love, and other life issues. I can approach her, but what if I do not reach her, I will not see her again, she is not just any random people I can just risk about. And if I fall in love, can I handle with my life and duty.

Yes, I do have a crush lately, or a crush that I only realize now, it is almost 10 years since I love someone. I had some little crushes but never seriously impact my day to day life.

This girl, I remember I first met her in my summer holiday term for ECO 2. I only felt that she is a very nice girl at the time. And when I got to 2^nd 3^rd year, when I see this girl, I always tell my best friend Paul: See this girl there, she is the cutest girl I have ever met on campus. (Even Paul does not keep that in mind) But yes, she really is cute. I never really complement randomly, guess it is my standard. But when I do, I really do mean it. But at the time, I only think she is just very cute.

But then I notice myself I always remember every time I see this girl. 1^st time in summer school, other time on jimmie, she sat on the stairs talking to someone, wearing a pink dress. Other few times in 3^rd year I met her studying very late, while I was having hardcore accounting study time. She was using a Mac book on 1^st floor and I was at -1. A random day at -1 floor, she wears this little white T shirt. Other day she wears a grey jersey. Honours year open days she wears green hoody and doing work on campus, and I was help other sport, I was so glad she is in UCT in 2010. Other time, I saw her showing direction to someone in the library. Saw her at the -1 floor with a pretty dress. Saw her at the library printing, I remember it was a rainy day I got so wet and I also met her in the subway, while we noticed each other. Saw her parking outside her house on a KIA car. Saw her twice when I get into lib and she got out.

I start noticing I remember all these moments and I am trying to get away from potential developing anything that I am scared to face. I remembered one day I wear this super unfriendly levis jean jacket just t give me courage that I am not up for anything, then I saw her again and I know I cannot forget about her.

Then, another time she is outside LS chatting. One time I was walking towards Lib and I was musing and once I turn back my sight and she walked pass and pretended not noticing me even I know she did. Another time at night, rugby field, I saw a girl with  very nice long hair in front of me. While I was so obsessed with this girl, I think the girl in front of me was nice, but never better than the girl I want. But then I was surprised she turned her head, and saw me, then she turned again, she realized it was me, then she never turned her hear again and kept walking straight. I was so stupidly happy that I saw her, with her nice brown long hair.

I believe it is that we both share a bit of shyness, and that is exactly why I have such attraction to her on her cute shyness, and sadly, I guess it is also this kind of little shyness that keep us apart.

 SAT studying downstairs, I was studying at the corner. Then she came right next to me, she was wearing a lot of cloths on the day, guess she felt very cold. And then when she took off her cloths and put it on the chair. She noticed me sitting right next to her. But then she was like “OMG, he is here, right here”, even she acted calm, I then looked at her, and she is kind of nervous, showing all over on her face. I am kind of happy, and yes, her cuteness is what gets me so bad.

I remembered I was studying and I knew it is not at all effective. But I just want to stay there, I knew she was starring, and I did not want to interfere her starring. Once I turned and looked at her, she turned away and look down reading the book. And I noticed she was so shy that she was brushing her hair ALL THE TIME. I had a smile and think the girl is soooooooooo cute!!!! Since it was so late like 11 pm, I asked if she parked close that she can drop me to my car. But sadly she did not drive on the day, and I had no excuse to quickly twist that. But yes, I had some effort on the day. Kind of creepy if I make more excuses.

But after those times, I never had another chance to talk to her, I have not seen her for a few weeks, and as I progress in 2010, the work went crazy. Most of the time, I met her in Lib, and guess what, everytime I am there I am there for business doing this crazy PGDA accounting.

So I asked: WHY? Why does it has to be this time? I remember after that, I had to write supp exam, and I saw her twice, once I was really need to pass that, then the other time is the day right before the exam. And the last day, was the day, I was flying to HK the next couple of days, I did not even have a chance to have a glance.

Just the past 2 months, I went back to her house at night, finally make up my mind and excuse, hoping to see her after I am now working. I rang the bell, old man and a guy came out, I said I want to say thank you to a girl used to live here. She found my car key. (That was not the case, but now I think of it, it was very related to her anyways, I was finding everywhere on that SAT, until I found it in my pocket)

The tall guy said I may referring to his sister, and she is now in Johannesburg. And as a good lie teller, I cannot pursue any more information but just tell him say thanks for me.

So she is in Johannesburg, I should have start working in JHB, even there is a 0.1% seeing her. I guess she also finished varsity. I felt relief first after I know how she has been, even I don’t know what she is there for. Then I felt sad I don’t think I may she her again.

I just do not think I am crazy enough to hit that door again, and tell them I have a real crush on your daughter/ sister. Please contact her for me! I… this is absurd even for me.

Why at this time? Why I feel like I meet the right person, at the worst time. I just feel right on this girl, and I guess she likes me, may be a bit. I think she may also have felt a bit disappointed not to at least know me, and I regretted gravely. If I see this girl again, I will never let go.

I know I do not love people easily, and this is why I feel bad when I miss. Even now I still have her in my mind when my brain is empty.

I think it is true that the unfulfilled love is always the most romantic.  

Damn, I miss you…

 

Yes, this is how stupid I am, on my action, and as a whole being a guy. This is what I want to share, the stupid “me”, the true “me”.

 

Sorry for the delay of the update. i have been sorting out alot things since I landed on the 1st Jan. Mostly, to prepare the mood to study and back to the healthy working mode.

Hong Kong trip was nice, it is not remarkable but I had good experience. I mainly bought cloths for my trainee article happen in Feb. The greatest moment is to meet up my friends and cousins there. Especially see my primary school friends, seeing each other grown up is really treasurable. I think some of us will be married when I go back the next time.

Now I have been mainly studying QE1, my progress is kind of slow but I have managed to go on full focus lately, and it seems I will be on time based on my current situation. It is also a relief that actually most of people in the library are in the exact situation and progress. So everything should go find and I will keep up the work and pray for it. Secondly, I have been working out like crazy since the 8th, after I found i have grown a size from indulging myself in HK. The worst thing about traveling is that your day to day life, especially your work out, will be negatively affected. There are not many space and time to do it while you on a trip. Anyways, I have managed to get back in shape, it is still on the way but it seems the major problem is solved. For guys, it seems to be easier to lose weight. While I am losing my weight using both male and female approach. (Work more and eat less) But I will be keeping on this diet as I don't feel any negative sign, I guess it is the correct portion I should be consuming.

2010...argh, how should I put it? It is the worst year of my life, but at the same time it is the year I never want to miss. And I have grown a lot this year and I would finally say that I am an adult who can take care of himself, as I have experienced it myself.

2010, it is mostly being in hell from the start, having the medical treatment which brings me extreme dryness on my skin. This is a long suffering which lasted until July. And this is not the worst. The worst effect is the rare side effect to patient which causes depression and demotivation, this stroke me real bad, and I can say this not only affected my academic, but my normal life during those time was so grey. It was grateful that I realized I was in a side effect so I eventually got through. And yes, I admitted there was a period of time during the early 2010 around May/June, I was mentally unstable and acted socially weird, and I don't really want to talk further than that, it was the worst I have experienced and that's it.

After July, I have finally get myself together but it was too late that all the major test and exam had passed, so I remained being depressed and hopeless that I thought I had to repeat my year. I mean it was so bad that my average was in thirty's. I only came back with motivation in the exam period, thinking that I can still pass by increasing my average marks in exam for at least 70%, as I know if I am going to fail, why not try my best first. As I expect to fail with glory, I was granted a supp with my worst course (while my mark is still amazing compared to the past), and with miracle passing all others. Eventually, I spent my whole Nov studying and finally smashed that exam. The outcome is like dream, I guess attempts really do make miracles.

While all these are bad experiences, I could say I finally understand what love is. Even I did not end up having it (I guess it is very much expected during all those things I have to care 'bout in my life)

For all those things I have done before 2010, I realized how stupid I was. Not to realize who I actually like, but rather than who and what I actually am. I have first begin to understand who am I and knowing what I want. Many memories of her, and many chances had been given, I refused to chase what I actually want and chose to fulfill my own duty. I guess I am morally correct , but it is personally unacceptable. If I have an other chance, I would have chosen differently. There are always things in life that have no right ways. Love is a rare thing, and it is really hard to find a good match. Anyways, if god exists, I cannot beg for anything more, as for what had been granted to me are way over than what I deserved.

These memories bring smiles to me, at the same time, with regret. To be honest, I don't really know her much, but I really do remember a lot of moments when I was with her. I do kind of miss her.

Often when people get old, they will realize something meaningful to their life. I think it is odd for me being so, at the age of 22 (23 in 2011). There was a night when I lied on the bed facing the roof, thinking about all the past and all I have been doing. There was a drop of tear coming down on my face. I was first surprised, then it came sorrow as I understood my subconsciousness. When I was a very young teenager, I dreamed about being a good person, being a meaningful person and help others. And of course having freedom and do what I want. But what strikes me is what I am doing. This is never being planned. I had never dreamed about being an accountant, and many other things. And more importantly, there aren't anything in my planned life being achieved, at least not from what I can see now. From what I remember, I always have a goal that is to make people around me being happy, and through this, I will be happy. In some case, it works and makes sense. However, in a long run, I realize life is not as simple as a science rule. I realized people personalities are different, and for some case, they conflicts with each other. By doing the way other people want, I may make them happy. Even it may not be a perfect idea for me, I am still happy about it. But when I have been repeatedly doing so for other people, this imperfection accumulates, with all these little flaws together, it becomes a big crack of my life. I realize I cannot be happy by doing what other people want, at least not always. I think this is the moment I have grown, and have my own view and personality. So even if I have not become what I have wanted to be, I have reached to a level that I am happy about, and finally being content about myself.

It is rather laughable that I had always acted outgoing or shy to some opposite sexes, and I keep telling myself I am too straight forward or being too nerdy and shy. It is actually that I am afraid of being myself and put down that luggage that does not mean anything to me, and to do whatever I want. Until I feel that feeling of don't know what to do. I may know very little about relationship but I think I know what love is. It is when you fear of the uncertainty and have worry on your action to someone, missing someone no matter who the person is, being angry with yourself of being a certain way, questioning about why you have done something which appears to be silly, and regret of not doing something other than what you have chosen. For me, it is not the dating lesson of being myself or something silly such as a drama lesson that teaches me how to fight my real personality and socialize with people. Instead, it is the understanding of the truth of life and live beyond the self-moral and confession, and start to live with the true self. It is never easy to do, when it conflicts with culture, family, other people's feeling, etc.

If some older people see this and say I am still young and there are a lot of chances. I will admit that it may be true, but deep in my heart I would scream at myself, questioning why I have not been chasing what I want but instead doing things that other people think it is right. Life is about feelings, and I finally understand. Feeling is a special sensation. And I realized a lot from it, not only the male and female relationship, but all relationships in the society. I realize, even people from the same family can have different views. Not everyone in this society can get along with everyone in their family. It is a pity, but the feeling is just not right. And this is why sometimes people share a greater bond with some strangers, than the people they have seen or known. It seems to be rather imperfect, but when one can get along with this truth and living happily with it, one will be perfect with his/her relationships.

I cannot say I am right compare to other people, but I would rather say I have my own view about life and living with it. And this is what making me grow.

30 Nov will hopefully be my last exam ever in UCT, I am somewhat confident about it, but wish me luck

I am very into staff spinning nowadays, got to fully master it, and yes, I am searching for a proper bo staff.

Life will be busy soon, it is kind of exciting.

Feeling very healthy, and my fitness is improving day by day, awesomeness will soon reach 200%.

Still not so sure how is my life going to be, but it is much more clear now. And well, it seems pretty awesome too.

I saw my little crush again, it was so unexpected that I would see her at this time, and I never expected I would ever see her again, thank you. She is just great and cute.

There is a chance of going back to HK for 2 weeks, but I feel worry of something in SA, I probably will stay.
Soon there will be nothing stopping me from whatever I want to chase after.

It seems people around know where they belong to. That's just not me, I don't really know, or I just don't belong to anywhere, yet. Is this a good thing?

I can say I want to experience more before I will settle and have my own family. Romance is what I want to have in every sense of my life. Romantically wake up, eat, work, go home, sleep, etc. But for this kind of person, I can actually fall in love or something and change what I am expecting to have.

That old memory of mind where 2 red applies standing next to each other just somewhat touches me, it is not so hard to be made but it is just a miracle to me. And the Durbanville Hill road where I reached the top of the road and there was a huge cloud behind me, is just amazing.

 

If life gives you lemons, sell them and be rich and awesome.

longest run ever! 27km

I could not say it is a run actually, I was dying in the last 7 km, my legs feel extreme exhausted now...

Graduation, x'mas, new year have passed now, so I am a bit bored. Well I guess it is some how good for me. Currently saving some money and try to lose some fat. It is pretty close that I am in shape because of the above situation. losing 1.5kg in 2 days with insane work out !!

And yes, UCT will start in 31 days, somehow I am excited but don't want it to come at the same time. I will properly have to study a bit just to make sure I am still in line. and supp. exams will begin in a week, bless all of the students that write them and hope Paul and Karin will get through that!!

Kisses of angel


The photo was captured when I was out running. I may find trace on my girl of dream. Apparently she is very kind heart and loving on everything. She must has loved this wall -_- very much, here are 4 kisses.


So it's been a while since I update the site.

It is now 4th quarter of UCT. wrote last test of the year, it is okay, at least felt much better than the previous ones.

There are a lot of things happening these days. Perhaps I should spend some time typing.

So last quarter changed me, like a lot, or I can say I know more of myself and enlightened my life.

Hmm... last quarter, I asked a girl straight ahead if she wanted to have a date. So she is one smiling beautiful angel, but not those arrogant look chick. (in fact I do like those arrogant looks) One more highlight is that she is a complete stranger.

Yeah, that's right! I don't know her at all. I was scared the first time, but I guessed I was high and there is no big deal asking. So I come up straight at the lower jimmie stairs, tagged her at the shoulder while she was walking down with a friend. Then I asked, she and her friend smiled, and said she has a boyfriend, so that's all.

It is that easy, not the right timing I guess. I felt much better after that, at least not like the averages that keep it on their own. I don't encourage you to do so, because if you do it and it works for you, there are less fish out there for me. Ha~ I am just kidding. Go for it. This experience makes me think in a new way of myself, and don't feel embarrassed at all.

So you hate my guts? I am cool with it, I am always like that,unpredicted, proud and mysterious.


Two days after that, I had a big fight with my dad. The relationship went really bad and tolerated. It is like I went up and down those days. Even my health went terrible. If the date is working, I would feel really sorry but cancel anything, I was really really broken at the time.

I think it will hardly return to what we were, the words are too destructive, I just can't simply forgive.


Then it is the 10 days break. But the worst is that there was that test right after. Okay, thx! went studying the whole period and the break is gone. Great that I find the test not so bad.

16 Sep, my 21st. went to casino with my friends, that was just an awesome night, really like the atmosphere, we talked about almost anything. Of course, I could not just leave my lucky day doing nothing. It did not disappoint me, I made my R50 into R300. Well, I was going to continues with 150 as I was pretty hot at the time, but Paul stopped because he said he was nervous. (He followed my bet and won R100) Anyways, I think it is good to have a mate to stop me.

I guess that's life, I rethink all these things. Happy and sad, it is not a big deal. I think about the happy stuff most of the time. I do think deep about my family issue, we have different standards, different wants, I cannot insist things must go well. It doesn't work, it doesn't work, just like any other relationship. He is my dad, I will treat the best I can through. But beside of that, I am living the best I cam. Most important is the present, I am pretty chilled and in a good shape.

I found it really hard to love someone, not that I have high standard, but it is just my own problem. Yet I don't really know what that is which prohibits me from having a relationship.

As time goes by, I have made up so many assumptions, so many excuses, so many reasons for "why no" to comfort myself to be what I am.

"What about the loneliness?" friend asked.

When I walk on campus at night; driving home in late night; listen to music in my room with a dim light on, staring at the roof. These sometimes do make me feel that I am alone. Everyone has loneliness, however it doesn't seem that lasts long for me. I do enjoy having my own time myself, as long as there are people out there know that I exist in this world. I just don't see how good is to be in a relationship, while I can shop whatever I want when there is no one complaining the price or style. Smile and be cheerful about my own experience, I do enjoy those moments very much.

There is a friend said that, when he finished all the studies and work, getting all tired and exhausted. As he gets back to his house and finds that the whole place is just darkness and no one is home, he just feels alone, desiring someone to talk to , to listen to his story.

That does seem to be very sad. But in my view, I think it is even more sad to get a relationship just to get sympathized. I don't want to be with someone just because I am scared to be alone, to get relenting from someone, to relief my physical and emotional tiredness.

It's just ridiculous to me. I don't think a relationship should be used to get sympathized, or even anything. People should not love because they want to get love by others. That is very hard to do, even myself may not be able to do that. We are not saints or angels... But I think people who love for a purpose, perhaps including me as well, are very superficial. Love should not be undergone for exchanging of anything, not even love itself. We should just love because we want to.

So it that there is no one that worth my love? That's what I don't know. There are girls that I may like, or some that may like me, but I just lack the mood and feelings to be in a relationship. People would say that I am inexperienced that I only get to be in love once. I do think that's alright however, I just need an experience, not like I want to train myself.

May be I am just afraid to be rejected, but I have strong feeling that there is probably other facts. For example, I am not very much socially active, not saying that I don't want to be with friends, but just passive when I have to host a big event or something. You can probably say I am lazy in socializing. Yes, I am really a jerk in this. That's why I assume I am lazy to desire to have relationship. I do believe relationship is very time consuming, and requires a lot of time to communicate and sharing interests. And I just don't think I would sacrifice hours and days to just get one thing. If I force myself to do so, but unable to achieve, then I will just get someone hurts.

And yes, people do tease the one that can't get kisses and making love. To me, I am sure they have no enjoyment from teasing me, but just a glance of ignorance. That's is probably one thing that pisses people off and think that I am such a big ego with nasty arrogance. I would understand that, but I would carry on to think like this, simply I admit that I am cocky in my view in relationship perspective.

People did say if I did not make so many boundaries to myself and stop this arrogance thing, I would probably end up to be one of those playboys with high popularity. But please, don't even compare me with those low lives.

What I want is just someone with a smile that makes me smile. No doubt people would think that I have no difference from choosing someone as a playboy, by looking at this only requirement. Anyways, I guess I do have some other factors in my mind subconsciously. And if I do understand myself in and out, I won't be the person that I am now, right?

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So that's the chocolate cake that I make, in fact there are two.

It is quite easy to make actually, mike/oil/2~3 eggs (suggest to add more eggs), these mix are at a ratio of 1:2:1

Mix that with the choc premix (make sure the stuff is perfectly mixed!!)

The chocolate cubes are only added right before it goes to the bakery, or added after 3~4 baking.

Pic (1) is a failure because the chocolate cubes are added too early, and they dive to the bottom.

Pic (2) uses normal chocolate which can be bought in any local food store, shatter and cast evenly on the mixing.

Spray some baking oil on the surface of the container as well !!

Bake at 180 'C, for 15 to 20 mins!
(P.S. poke the cake with a stick to test if it is ready. Finish when no mixing attached to the stick)

最近有機會看到一些香港的電視節目, 看到一個關於"港男""港女"互相責備對方的缺點. 雖然我不在香港居住, 沒有照香港男生文化生活, 可是我在香港出生, 也說是一個香港男生, 所以我覺得要為"港男"平反!!

上面的圖是說一個"港男"的特質, upload後好像看不到, 可是我想是很容易在internet 找到的.

1. [用小孩子語氣跟女友說話] : 我不會這樣, 可是男生這樣跟女生說話也是調情吧! 有甚麼不對的? (我哥好像是這樣的...ha~)

2. [女友不滿, 所以把色情video delete] : Come on, that's showing the respect to the girl!! What's wrong with that??

3. [因女友喜歡小狗, 自己才喜歡] : 這真的是不對, 我絕對覺得是不對, 也強調不應該為一段戀愛而去養動物. 分手的話, 那些pets 大多都是被遺棄的. 這一點都不respect 生命, pets都有生命. 在TV show 看到一個主持說, "人的一生經歷很多事物, 包括自己的寵物, 可是寵物們的一生只有自已的主人."

我想這些情侶都很自私. 我想不是所有香港男生都是這樣吧!

4. [被女友打後自覺say sorry] : 這樣的男人真的沒有dignity. I mean if that's fine if it's only some little drama, but if that's for real... I mean "what the fuck, bitch?!)

5. [會跟情敵對罵可不敢對打] : 文明人都不會容易開打吧, 在理論上不出手也沒有錯. 當然如果那人對女友做了一些事情, 會開打也可以明白的.

6. [常跟朋友說自已的女友不喜歡] : 這是對女友在意, 錯什麼? 白痴嗎??

7. [男人去學baking, 織東西] : to do something that an ordinary guy can't usually do, that's special. And some girls do think guy who can cook is sexy. Just get yourself educated, lot of top chefs are guys!

8. [wants girlfriend to do plastic surgery but have no guts to say it] : those guys are weak then, I can't say anything. But if the guy kind of dislike his partner appearance, why hang out with her??

9./10. (I made a mistake here)
[自覺為女友拿handbag] : those guys are nice. why complain about it? 可是個人不會這樣做, I may even refuse if the girl asks for it. 雖然我一向都不是大男人, 可是我想這也是我的底線, it's just a girl thing if you know what I mean. But I will do for sure if she really needs help, like no hands to carry or go to bathroom or something.

11. [被取笑被女友修眉, 可是覺得幸福] : that's cute, people should appreciate those guys. Although I think that's kind of lame for me...

12. [如果女友走在後面, 會縮回女友後] : 我相信不是所有的男生都這樣吧! 這真的很沒用.

13. [外表風光, 內裡乾塘] : I don't really understand this, but I think the inner reflects the outside look, if you think that guy is 外表風光, 內裡乾塘. Then you are wrong, he does not look good, and there is probably something wrong with how one's judgement on people's good outlook.

14. [agree with 後面公主, 前面番薯] : That's fine with that, my friends and I think the same too. The majority of people usually give you a surprise at the back, and even bigger when you see then on the face. (or majority of people are just ugly?) If girls think that guys who think that is wrong, and bad, they just usually do not have confidence on their look.

15. [女友不開心可不顧朋友] : 在感情上, 男生很尊重女生, 在男女關係上沒有錯,可是這也不太健康. That just spoil the girl too much, and relationship likes this does end quick, or just not happy for one side. If I don't think it's right, then I would say it even one can upset, at least no feeling left behind. And that's what people should do, settle it now, rather than get it worse. By the way, why HK girl blame guys about that?

16. [frustrated when planning out activities with the partner] : that's just stupid to blame, that shows care!! what on earth are people thinking these days! or are you blaming there are always boring things to do with him, then you not hanging out with someone you like.

17. [no guts to do some hardcore sex position but have guts to do it with some others] : because the guy doesn't not want to make the girl to think that he's a pervert. think about it, if a girl asks a guy, usually the guy does think she is kind of pervert. So HK girls want the guys being straight up? "you look hot and give me your anal!" That's just really weird for a person to appreciate that, at least for me.

18. [if partner refuses to have intercourse, then he will do it himself] : he does have other options, but he choose this because he cares your feelings, bitch!

19. [partner dislike > one dislike] : 這也是在意他人感受吧! As I say, it is necessary to express the true feelings and emotions. That's important in a relationship.

20. [pour drinks for your girl] : seriously, are people insane? complaining about a guy being a gentleman, or you just like the guy to slap so you feel dominated? 還是女孩們喜歡為男生們倒茶? 我可沒有聽說過.

21. [borrow money from the other half] : If it's "going dutch", then guys probably won't do that. But an ordinary man won't do that, there are others like friends and family to ask, so if he does that, he probably really needs help for something important, or otherwise he is a jerk. (Do people do that a lot in HK? I don't think so. But if a girl complains about it, and says that happens to her a lot, then she is likely is be a woman of no quality and gets chased by jerks for opportunities.)

22. [敢怒不敢言] : 相信如果男生真的說出了, 女生還是complain anyways, no point for this.

23. [always dream about to have a rich girlfriend] : I don't think it's a dream for guys, instead guys may prefer other factors. But I think guys would probably think a nice girl and rich is a bonus. (Not like someone else thinks wealth is the 1st requirement for choosing partners) I never heard my friends say they want to be with a rich girl.

I want someone with inside and outside beauty, and makes me smile because she smiles and feels happy, that's it.
And don't be picky about this my outside beauty requirement! Both in and out are important, because you never would know or truly see someone's inside beauty if you are not attracted by their outlook at the first place! If you think you not attractive, don't hate me here because I don't like you.